Wednesday, May 18, 2005

OK I'm Back for a minute...

OK I know I've neglected the blog thing a while. Part of that is due to audioblogger destroying my posts. And now that I'm trying to type, my eye is stinging like there's some more metal in there (I've had 3 pieces of cobalt taken out of my eye 2 years ago.) So it's hard to do anything. Anyway I did get a car. Not the Lexus I was looking for. But I did buy a nice Infinity J30. I am still alive folks. Just busy with work, poker , boxing, working out , cars , and (last but not least) my hot wife. Maybe I'm screwed up but I'm trying to live life and have fun before I get too old. I think I am going to check out the Star Wars movie. Used to love it as a kid. I hated the first of the new ones- the one with the jive talking annoying Jamaican Kangaroo thing. I hated that fucking thing. And somthing about Liam Neeson or whatever his name is reminds me of a child molester. Just somthing about him is creepy. I would love to see Darth Vader beat the fuck out of yoda and like pull his guts out and swing him around by them. I hate yoda, I hated how the geeks in the movie theater were cheering when the stupid thing was fighting Christopher Lee ( an actually COOL bad guy in any film )and he started jumping around. Yoda is so damn stupid. I know he won't get killed in the film , because he lives for the other three films. The best thing I'll probably see is Samuel L. Jackson getting whacked, but the trade off is eventually Darth Vader becomes half a black man to replace him ( when James Earl Jones takes over the voice) What about the more realistic brothers in Star Wars? How about a back stabbing Lando Calrissian who was trying to fuck princess Leia and ended up with the Millenium Falcon? If Lucas did the film with Lando during modern times he should have put spinners on it. Of course if the original Star Wars was done today, you'd have fucking Ice Cube or Usher playing Han Solo, and princess Leia would be some hot blonde slut , and Luke Skywalker would be a white guy who was a bitch(probably Steve from Blue's Clues) and needed the constant help of the black "Alpha Male" and the know it all woman who would constanly have all the "brains". Isn't that the formula for most shit today? The white guy is a one dimeinsional character who is greatly flawed , and wouldn't make it without his white woman and black friend. Obi wan would also half to be a black man (because he is percieved as wise, so due to Hollywood's "formula", all wise men are black) and C-3p0 would probably be a stypathetic gay character who constantly made the white guy out to be an ignorant homophobe. Chewbacca would be that idiot black actor from the Green Mile- Michael Clark Duncan- so they could fill the other black stereotype (not the one that all black men are superior lovers and all knowing) but the other black sterotype of the black man as a "strong protector" (same reason the minute Brittney Whores or Fistina Auguleira go out and hire 300 lb black guys as bodyguards) R2 D2 would be some wizecracking racist brother like Chris Rock, and of course Darth Vader would be your common , run of the mill pussy talking English accent white guy. Or maybe Chris Walken, who could give some of his stupid ass dialouge about evil. Just as long as the white guys are looked as homophobe, homosexual , or self absorbed monolouge spewing idiots Hollywood would be happy. OK one more idea for Darth Vader - Adam Sandler. And make sure there are "Kerry Edwards" stickers on the X wings... Now think about that...